Start in Perth: 10.20am local/1.20pm AEDT/2.20am GMT
Day one report | Ashes top 100 | Series omens | Mail Geoff

Have we all got our breath back? That was an absolutely nonsense, absurd, bizarre opening day: 19 wickets in a Test day in Australia that only contained about 70 overs. Can nobody remember how to bat anymore? Was the pitch too difficult? The answer is no, not really, because some players do still bat for long periods of time elsewhere, and the surface had some pace and bounce but nothing inconsistent or unplayable. It’s just that nobody played it well, against some decent fast bowling.

So we’re almost 50% of the way through the match in scoreboard terms, in 20% of the allotted days and 16.4% of the allotted overs. Holy balance sheet, Robin.